The Garden that Never was

Here it is. My garden.

I kind of like the wild mayhem that this garden presents. Some have dared to refer it as weeds! I want to be responsible though and say that I initially planned to do a garden this summer but just never got "around to it". Sigh!

This summer has been a big lesson in focusing my energy, ok so I know it did not happen in my backyard, but it happened in other places and it was wonderful. Being in the present moment. Even though I liked Eckhart Tolle's book "The power of Now" it had one fatal flaw and is the reason why it does not teach this powerful lesson. I found the book too long and philosophical, not really explaining why (in simple terms) it is important to focus our energy or giving techniques to do so.

The easiest way to focus is to concentrate with your full being only to the task you are presented with at hand, even if its brushing your teeth. Try it, its not easy to do on a consistant basis. When you do it feels like magic, especially if you can maintain this for hours. I had that experience this summer as I began to engage with my painting and drawing after a 4 year hiatus. You feel totally engrossed in the moment and lose track of time. Another way to prepare the mind to be more receptive to focusing is meditation. Also the more you learn to focus the better you can meditate. When we learn this important skill we do not waste energy and react to life but live more fully in the flowing energy of life. With the skill of an archer we aim towards the result of the task at hand, then flow fully toward the next task.

Our life becomes a garden we carefully cultivate instead of life molding us to its ups and downs.

"The man who has daily enured himself to the habits of concentrated attention, energetic volition and self-denial in unnessary things will stand like a tower when everything rocks around him and when his softer fellow-mortals are winnowed like chaft in the blast." Henry James

To the Centre of the Labyrinth

In other dimensions there is no such thing as time.

It is possible to extend one's boundary beyond form and time even in this dimension, when we observe our dream becomes our life and our life is our dream. I had a dream last night where I stood at the centre of rings like Saturn's which converged to a point, hovering in outer space. The focal point was presented as if it were a still, calm center, like the eye of a hurricane. The vision remained with me all day, even if what the day initially seemed to present was not ah, as poetic.

Today I walked, bundle buggy rumbling in front of me with two green bags of garbage on my way to the dump at Ted Reeves arena. First I was on enroute to another location (which my neighbor pointed me to) but couldn't find the dump site. So I trundled along, sweating and feeling strange, otherworldly. How can this be possible, I'm trailing around the city with garbage! The workers at the Ted Reeves site told me where to go, not really as they are on strike and have to make it difficult I surmised. I literally got lost in a labyrinth of houses, tree filled dead-ends, curving streets and curious people along the way who guided me to my final destination.

The journey which should have taken me 30 minutes took three hours. I did finally unload my garbage where it should go, but it got me thinking about our process to becoming conscious beings. In order to do that one has to work through one's garbage. The souls evolution has a curious winding and unwinding process to it. Like a journey into and out of the labyrinth.

The Mind's Eye

I believe it is in our minds and hearts that we are most linked to god. In this age where reason seems to rule and everything needs to be proven, even people's most sacred and cherished experiences are being dissected under the critical lens of science. I read recently that a study had been conducted to prove that people's near-death spiritual experiences were nothing more than a certain part of the brain being stimulated. My answer is, "So and why?" Could that not mean the reality that we live from day to day in all its wonder and dreariness. Our capacity to see, smell a beautiful flower, feel love, hate, our memories and our future dreams are also a stimulation of some lobe in the brain. Does it matter?

My question is why does science, when its at its worst, want to diminish the power and beauty of life, of living.

I have included an image of sky and clouds because often I get feelings, impressions, predictions and creative insights from gazing at clouds. Call me flaky. But I think its an important part of being human to imagine and inspire ourselves. I know that my creator wants me to use my brain in this way as well. The logic brain is a good part of us, but our non-rational (which is a ill-used part of the brain) is also an important part. It allows us to fly free from the restraints of our body and our mortal life. I believe that the experiences we have that are sacred and creative to us are just as important if not more so, than what a scientist in a lab might deduce sticking electrodes on a guinea pig's brain. Another idea is, couldn't our science dollars be better spent finding ways to clean our dwindling fresh water supplies? I got that idea today staring at the scales on a goldfish...

Mojo the Magic Cat

The cat pictured on the right is one of my babies Mojo. He's been in my life for just under two years and from the moment I met him he has been a teacher to me. I was first introduced to him in a dream when a small kitten appeared with a nametag in his mouth, Mojo. A friend alerted me to some kittens just six months after losing my beloved Eddy. I wasn't ready for another cat but as soon as I saw little Mojo's face I remembered the dream and quickly made arrangements to adopt him.

What an amazing little cat he is. I live in a long hallway of an apartment and I would be in one end there was Mojo, I walked along a long hallway and there would be Mojo to greet me at the other end without brushing past my legs. Was he popping around inter-dimensionally. I couldn't figure it out. How was he doing that? It became our game as he would do it time and time again. I kept feeling something very mysterious was happening but could not explain it.

One night I was meditating. The cats often come into the room and meditate with me. I believe they love the energy. I have a drawing table right across from where I meditate. As I opened my eyes to come out of my meditation I watched in amazement as a shadowy shape across from me, seated on the table slowly materialized in the form of Mojo, my cat.

So I had my answer, cats are magical, the wierd thing is I feel Mojo is only doing ahead of time (and so easily it seems as if to say look here this is how you do it) what I've begun doing very intensely in menopause. Astral-traveling, sometimes I have such difficulty getting back into my body after a I wake up that I've got to lay down for a few minutes to re-enter the atmosphere like an astronaut or something.

Mojo continues to sleep as pictured above, lick his paws and look at me as if to say, c'mon catch up would ya!!!

Dark Night of the Soul (and a cup o joe)

I think its the simple things in life that get us through the hard times. Part of my spiritual development is when I get accelerated or go through changes with my antenna (psychic gifts or as I like to call them spidey senses) I experience what has been know by spiritual folk from time immemorial as "The Dark Night of the Soul". To put this into very basic terms its what ever you have deemed not ok about yourself (family members who are stuck themselves or society at large may have told you as well some behavior or gift was inappropriate) or quality you might have that you were shamed about. As humans we relegate this to the unconscious. The only problem; it is usually those qualities we have learned not to like about ourselves and to subjugate, that are a more authentic expression of who we are.

If we are growing spiritually, developing our soul, and living our life's purpose here on Earth we must go through these times of cleansing in order to excavate the old outworn ways of being, heal, die to those beliefs and bring in the new. Sometimes if we have been holding back our growth, this can feel very unpleasant and create a great deal of havoc in our lives.

That is why I like to focus on the simple things in life to get through those times. Like for example a good cup of Joe. What you see here in the photo is a cup of coffee in a fav mug and my construction worker's thermos I got for fifty cents at a garage sale. Just seeing these items in the morning and brewing my organic fair trade coffee helps me to get through the worst of the ugly meanies that seem to surface at this time, in order that I can break through and be the beautiful butterfly that I am really meant to be.

Michael Jackson's Untimely Death

The reason my prior post took so long for me to finish writing and upload is because I have be cut open to the core about the mystery and enigma that is the extraordinary musical talent, humanitarian and probably many, many other things to people around the world, Michael Jackson. I do believe humanity has lost a precious and vulnerable soul, a being of light. A truly loving man who gave of himself to a world who loved him, judged him and scrutinized his every move since he was six years old. Imagine that Mr. Jackson has been under the critical lens of the public eye, surrounded by body guards since he was a very young boy. I can not comprehend, along with the emotional and physical abuse he suffered at the hands of his father, how this must have impacted him. Being a survivor of child abuse and domestic violence myself, Michael's passing with all it's bizarre ritual attached to it be it from his family, aids, fans or the press, has opened up all my own wounds for re-examination.

The grief I feel is not only for Michael Jackson and how I have to admit to myself I did not understand what an amazing contribution this man made to the world, for love, from the purist part of himself. The grief I feel is also for myself, and all others who are sensitive. Who feel so deeply and can be so hurt by the cruelty of the world sometimes. I immediately felt, OK, I'm not reading or listening to gossip anymore because I see what it does to a person, their image, among other things what it does to ourselves. It kind of brings out the cruelest, lowest part of our own nature. We are not hurting Michael anymore, for he will live on in the hearts and minds of humanity forever. We are really hurting and demeaning ourselves by continuing on this path.

I've decided here and now to focus on the positive energy Michael brought to the planet. That is how I will always remember Michael Jackson in my heart, as an incredibly sensitive artist who (when he was at his best) felt so deeply the pain of the planet that he wanted to enlighten us and lift us up through his music and dance. He was a person who took many actions (as well as donated millions) to improve situations for others globally.

Rest in Peace Michael Jackson, we will miss you! My prayers are with all the fans who mourn for Michael Jackson at this time. Peace.

"Consciousness expresses itself through creation. This world we live in is the dance of the creator. Dancers come and go in the twinkling of an eye but the dance lives on. On many an occasion, when I am dancing. I have felt touched by something sacred. In those moments, I felt my spirit soar and becoming one with everything that exists. I become one with the stars and the moon. I keep on dancing until there is only the dance."
Michael Jackson, from Dangerous